Proverbs 27:6




'Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.'
Surely we’ve all had moments when friends have said something to us which made us go: “Ouch!” Perhaps they were giving us a loving warning or strongly disagreeing with our opinion. The ouch was real but, when we got over it, we realised that they said it because they cared. That doesn’t mean they were necessarily right, of course, but the reason they spoke in the way that they did was because of the friendship.
Superficially, it is nicer to be kissed than to receive a wound. But the writer of Proverbs makes the point that what really matters is where the kiss or the wound come from. If an enemy kisses you, it might feel nice for a moment but it is a lie. There is no love or commitment behind it and you are much better off without it. A wound that comes from a sincere friend is infinitely more valuable.
Speaking truth is never an easy matter. We are continually tempted to try to make people like us by saying the things they want to hear. All our instincts are to avoid confrontation by not saying the things that we know they don’t want to hear. But God’s intention is that we should be speakers of truth. In the apostle Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, he was concerned for Christian growth. He wanted his friends to become stronger in their faith and for the whole church to become stronger. He wrote that, as we speak the truth in love we will grow “in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of the body, the Church” (Ephesians 4:15).




Of course, it must never be our intention to wound anyone. That’s a terrible idea. But the truth is so precious that we must make sure we don’t keep it from our friends, even when it is going to hurt. And for the same reason, we must respond well when they share words of truth with us.




Question: When were you last wounded by the words of a friend, and what did you learn from that experience?
Prayer: Lord God, help us always to speak truth that is full of your love. Amen

Released on 20 Sep 2022