Day 43 - Issue 34

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Isaiah 61:3 NLT 
'To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory.'
Holding on to our faith when we face difficulties is hard. It is a wonder that we still encounter the beauty and presence of God even as our heart breaks. Anyone who has faced the challenge of chronic or terminal illness or the death of a loved one, will know just how physical the effects of such an experience are. Each moment carries a reality unknown previously and the act of living becomes exhausting. 
I naturally want to find someone to blame, to pour out the internal angst and pain. Yet, my experience is shared by thousands. I’m invited to step beyond my despair and search for the oil of mercy that will eventually bring healing to my wounds. This is only available from God, often the person I want to hold responsible for my extreme pain. God can handle my honest rants, born of that pain and confusion. Yet, even as my energy falters, as my angry words fall away, I can experience the Holy Spirit soothing my wounds. Like the wounded man abandoned by the roadside I shall take time to recover. Yet, God attends to me and has paid the price for my recovery, even though the experience and its scars may never entirely leave me. 
I’ve discovered that, while wounded, I grow stronger and become more stable in both my affection for God and my discipleship. I discover a measured joy; a celebration of God’s presence that, while never erasing my sadness, carries me carefully and with respect. After all, why would I ever want to lay aside the reality of such sadness, for it is the evidence of the love I hold for the one I’ve lost. There appears a beauty even in such sadness.  
God is Lord of all, but our experiences are also a consequence of a world which, while redeemed, awaits the full expression and experience of that redemption.  
QUESTION: Do you hold God responsible for everything? 
PRAYER: Thank you, Lord, that you are trustworthy, even in the hardest circumstances.  

Released on 28 Aug 2020

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      • PodcastEpisode.php#100premier740μsselect * from `podcasts` where `podcasts`.`id` = 12 and `podcasts`.`deleted_at` is null limit 1
        Bindings
        • 0: 12
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/PodcastEpisode.php:100
        • app/Models/PodcastEpisode.php:127
        • view::livewire.section-podcast-player:194
        • vendor/livewire/livewire/src/Mechanisms/ExtendBlade/ExtendedCompilerEngine.php:38
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/CompilerEngine.php:75
      • PodcastEpisode.php#132premier390μsselect * from `brands` where `brands`.`id` = 81 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null limit 1
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/PodcastEpisode.php:132
        • view::livewire.section-podcast-player:194
        • vendor/livewire/livewire/src/Mechanisms/ExtendBlade/ExtendedCompilerEngine.php:38
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/CompilerEngine.php:75
        • vendor/livewire/livewire/src/Mechanisms/ExtendBlade/ExtendedCompilerEngine.php:16
      • ContentFamilyTrait.php#18premier1.4msselect * from `brand_pages` where `brand_pages`.`brand_id` = 81 and `brand_pages`.`brand_id` is not null and ((not exists (select * from `brands` where `brand_pages`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null)) or (exists (select * from `brands` where `brand_pages`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `is_active` = 1 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null))) and `is_active` = 1 and `brand_pages`.`deleted_at` is null
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        • 1: 1
        • 2: 1
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Traits/ContentFamilyTrait.php:18
        • app/Models/Brand.php:109
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:43
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
      • ContentFamilyTrait.php#18premier680μsselect * from `audio_series` where `audio_series`.`brand_id` = 81 and `audio_series`.`brand_id` is not null and ((not exists (select * from `brands` where `audio_series`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null)) or (exists (select * from `brands` where `audio_series`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `is_active` = 1 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null))) and `is_active` = 1 and `audio_series`.`deleted_at` is null
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        • 1: 1
        • 2: 1
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Traits/ContentFamilyTrait.php:18
        • app/Models/Brand.php:110
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:43
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
      • ContentFamilyTrait.php#18premier650μsselect * from `article_series` where `article_series`.`brand_id` = 81 and `article_series`.`brand_id` is not null and ((not exists (select * from `brands` where `article_series`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null)) or (exists (select * from `brands` where `article_series`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `is_active` = 1 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null))) and `is_active` = 1 and `article_series`.`deleted_at` is null
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        • 1: 1
        • 2: 1
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Traits/ContentFamilyTrait.php:18
        • app/Models/Brand.php:111
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:43
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
      • ContentFamilyTrait.php#18premier600μsselect * from `podcasts` where `podcasts`.`brand_id` = 81 and `podcasts`.`brand_id` is not null and ((not exists (select * from `brands` where `podcasts`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null)) or (exists (select * from `brands` where `podcasts`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `is_active` = 1 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null))) and `is_active` = 1 and `podcasts`.`deleted_at` is null
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        • 1: 1
        • 2: 1
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Traits/ContentFamilyTrait.php:18
        • app/Models/Brand.php:112
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:43
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
      • Podcast.php#137premier380μsselect * from `brands` where `brands`.`id` = 81 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null limit 1
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Podcast.php:137
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:46
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
        • vendor/livewire/livewire/src/Mechanisms/ExtendBlade/ExtendedCompilerEngine.php:22
      • ContentFamilyTrait.php#18premier500μsselect * from `brand_pages` where `brand_pages`.`brand_id` = 81 and `brand_pages`.`brand_id` is not null and ((not exists (select * from `brands` where `brand_pages`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null)) or (exists (select * from `brands` where `brand_pages`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `is_active` = 1 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null))) and `is_active` = 1 and `brand_pages`.`deleted_at` is null
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        • 1: 1
        • 2: 1
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Traits/ContentFamilyTrait.php:18
        • app/Models/Brand.php:109
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:52
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
      • ContentFamilyTrait.php#18premier570μsselect * from `audio_series` where `audio_series`.`brand_id` = 81 and `audio_series`.`brand_id` is not null and ((not exists (select * from `brands` where `audio_series`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null)) or (exists (select * from `brands` where `audio_series`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `is_active` = 1 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null))) and `is_active` = 1 and `audio_series`.`deleted_at` is null
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        • 1: 1
        • 2: 1
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Traits/ContentFamilyTrait.php:18
        • app/Models/Brand.php:110
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:52
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
      • ContentFamilyTrait.php#18premier560μsselect * from `article_series` where `article_series`.`brand_id` = 81 and `article_series`.`brand_id` is not null and ((not exists (select * from `brands` where `article_series`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null)) or (exists (select * from `brands` where `article_series`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `is_active` = 1 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null))) and `is_active` = 1 and `article_series`.`deleted_at` is null
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        • 1: 1
        • 2: 1
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Traits/ContentFamilyTrait.php:18
        • app/Models/Brand.php:111
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:52
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
      • ContentFamilyTrait.php#18premier550μsselect * from `podcasts` where `podcasts`.`brand_id` = 81 and `podcasts`.`brand_id` is not null and ((not exists (select * from `brands` where `podcasts`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null)) or (exists (select * from `brands` where `podcasts`.`brand_id` = `brands`.`id` and `is_active` = 1 and `brands`.`deleted_at` is null))) and `is_active` = 1 and `podcasts`.`deleted_at` is null
        Bindings
        • 0: 81
        • 1: 1
        • 2: 1
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Traits/ContentFamilyTrait.php:18
        • app/Models/Brand.php:112
        • view::components.sections.sub-menu-brand:52
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
      • Setting.php#20premier320μsselect * from `settings` where `setting_key` = 'web_donation_link' limit 1
        Bindings
        • 0: web_donation_link
        Backtrace
        • app/Models/Setting.php:20
        • app/Helpers/Settings.php:6
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/Filesystem/Filesystem.php:124
        • vendor/laravel/framework/src/Illuminate/View/Engines/PhpEngine.php:58
        • vendor/livewire/livewire/src/Mechanisms/ExtendBlade/ExtendedCompilerEngine.php:22
      App\Models\Brand
      7Brand.php#?
      App\Models\Podcast
      7Podcast.php#?
      App\Models\PodcastEpisode
      5PodcastEpisode.php#?
      App\Models\Setting
      3Setting.php#?
      section-podcast-player #YQZbP81q5SidaN0Dhcvl
      array:4 [ "data" => array:8 [ "podcast" => App\Models\Podcast {#2312 #connection: "mysql...
          _token
          vywdQVig7xKPPi1g377jyeSKeazqV4cNxK5af6Pi
          ClearShow all
          Date ↕MethodURLData
          #12025-06-17 20:14:46GET/be-still-and-know/podcasts/episodes/day-43-issue-346437221